three inches

i look across the room
i see you
staring back at me
a fresh smile for the day
you are so innocent
and so naive
you are so young
i definately am out of your league
in oh so many ways
i look down at you
my mind just whispers, three inches
down.
just three inches down
so silky smooth
so pure yet tainted
i listen to you speaking
and just look into your eyes
and take me somewhere i've never been
a forbidden zone for so many years
i have no idea why i am overcome with such desire
for something i am clearly never wanting
but yet if i just had three more inches
down.
imagery.
i'd be in a fantasy world where only lust desires
i know this wont make sense to anyone who reads it
but i just wished i had the chance to reach
just over
or down
or up
just three inches
and endure
the moment.

No One Listens

It is so sad
when you are reaching out
and no one listens
even if i were Peter, who cried wolf too many times
i still am human
i still need help
if no one will listen
when i am speaking
no one is standing here
looking at me for who i really am
no one listens
i have spoke a lot of love
i have spoke a lot of anger
i have spoke a lot of regret
but no matter what
i am speaking out now
screaming
every step i take
and no one listens
when i am speaking
i feel so alone
in this world where there people out there
but i am here still speaking
but no one listens
do i not exist
am i a ghost
where do i belong
why should i even belong
in this world
if no one will listen

d.

My Life Sucks Because Of You

There you are
so ever present
standing in my shadow
taunting me
speaking to me
circing me
leave me alone
i ask repeatedly
when will this be over
when will you disappear
FOREVER
my life sucks
because of you
is this what i will feel like
forever to have you following me
inserting yourself within me
clawing at me when i try to run
no operation possible to rid you
no medication alive to push you away
no one else seems to see you
but i see you everyday
you are at my job
you are with me in the car
you sleep next to me each night
how can i rid of you
when i dont know who you are
my whole adult life you seem
to just be a thorn in my side
and affect every portion of my life
every decision
every thought
is derived from you
my life sucks
because of you

Confessions of a Bi-Polar Bear

Forgive me "Father" for which I have sinned
there, here, and everywhere
no matter what I do
it's never the right decision
I confess to doing the wrong things
yet I want to do the right things
only to be rejected and ejected
landing on my ass where I am spinning around
please give me another change, again
to get this under control
my mind wanders off
then I do things I dont realize I do
afraid of who I am
maybe I am not within
someone else impulsively makes those decisions
leaning me towards a path of destruction
and causing more heart ache for everyone around me
i am sorry
i am asking to be forgiven
i am not in my right mind
as i am a lonely animal
living on an iceberg
as i am the
bipolar bear